In honor of Netflix UK suddenly adding 5 seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race to my queue, I’m spending this week celebrating my love of drag queens. While I catch up on all the drama, I’m busy finding ways to share their style, wit, and wisdom with all of you.
I’m no stranger to drag. I once dressed as Jim Morrison for Halloween. I had to create an impromptu prosthetic out of a pair of tights so I’d walk more like a man. This gave me a whole new appreciation for the discomfort men face on a daily basis. Frankly, I don’t know how they function with those things.
Why would YOU want to look like a drag queen?
You don’t. No really, you don’t. I’m not going to try to convince you otherwise.
BUT drag queens know how to command attention. They are unapologetic about who they are. They add drama and sparkle and humor to our lives… and I think the rest of us can learn a lot from them. Anyhoo, here are some Do’s and a few very important Don’ts which will add a little glitter to your daily existence.
THINGS YOU CAN LEARN FROM DRAG QUEENS:
- Be fierce. Stop worrying what other people think and just be awesome.
- Put some drama in your wardrobe… just leave the drama out of your life.
- Be fearless. Drag queens have a tendency to polarize people – attracting both boos and cheers. If you can learn not to let the boos get to you, you’ll make great friends with the people who are cheering you on… people you probably wouldn’t have met otherwise. If your main concern when getting dressed is NOT calling attention to yourself, then you will be overlooked. And as a great woman once said, it’s better to be looked-over than to be overlooked.
- Learn how to make something from nothing. Drag queens are famed for their ability to take your grandmother’s dress, a tea cosy, and the debris from your sofa cushions and make something spectacular. Obviously I don’t mean this literally – please do not hot-glue-gun a bunch of Barbie shoes onto a hat and say it was my idea (unless it looks amazing, in which case I’m happy to take the credit). My point is that you can create drama and great style on even the most meager budget. All it takes is a little bravery and a bit of imagination. Besides, we all know that money can’t buy taste (Kanye West, I’m looking at you).
- Love your curves! You may think you have a big butt, but drag queens go to a lot of trouble to get curves like that. Work ‘em, gurl!
- Understand proportion. If a man with a thick waist and no hips can create the illusion of an hourglass figure, then so can you.
- You’re not in Kansas anymore. In my case, this is literal (I grew up in Wichita). The point is, maybe you can never go home again, but how’re you gonna keep ‘em down on the farm after they’ve seen the grass on the other side of the fence? You are not the person you were 10 years ago. You’re not even the person you were 1 year ago. Like the Phoenix, Madonna, and thousands of drag queens, you too have the power of constant reinvention. Don’t waste that stagnating in the pool of your “glory days.” If you keep trying, your best days may be ahead of you.
- Never underestimate the power of a great pair of legs. If you’ve got it, flaunt it. Just don’t flaunt so much that we find your hidden treasure.
- Sparkle is for the daytime, too. My 5-year-old daughter would heartily agree with this advice. No day is complete without pink glitter unicorns. In dresses.
- Posture. Posture, posture, posture. Have you ever seen a queen slouch?
- Have a sense of humor. Life is too short to take yourself seriously. Besides, nobody else does.
3 THINGS YOU SHOULD NOT TAKE FROM DRAG QUEENS:
- Makeup lessons. Oh, no, child. Unless you want to look like Abraham Lincoln and the Joker had a lovechild which was raised by clowns in a MAC factory.
- Hairstyling advice. Trust me, you’re not getting any nearer to God. Unless you’re Lady Gaga, for whom drag hair would be a step closer to natural.
- Tips on accessorizing. Two words: Kitchen. Sink. You want to look like a diva, not a queen.
- A bad attitude. Look like a diva. Stand like a queen. Just don’t expect anyone to kiss your ass. Stay humble. Stay kind. Leave the attitude in the closet.
Coming up next: Practical advice on adding a little drag inspiration to your wardrobe!